The premise ofThe Office—borrowed from its original U.K. counterpart—is as simple as a blank sheet of paper. A documentary crew decides to follow the employees of the Dunder Mifflin paper company (Scranton branch) for eight straight years, for reasons that are never made quite clear. But man, the things their cameras captured.
We got to watch a doofy-haired salesman named Jim Halpert (John Krasinski) fall in love with the engaged receptionist Pam Beesly (Jenna Fischer) five feet away. We watched the Regional Manager Michael Scott (Steve Carell) grow from a childish buffoon to a slightly less childish man, and then to an ever-so-slightly less childish husband to HR representative Holly Flax (Amy Ryan). The crew followed an unstable beet farmer called Dwight Schrute (Rainn Wilson), chronicled the descent into douchebaggery of a young temp named Ryan Howard (B.J. Novak), and even—once in a rare blue moon—caught Stanley Hudson (Leslie David Baker) voluntarily standing up from his chair.
Yes,The Office’s low points are well-documented. You may notice the list below doesn’t contain a single entry from Season 8, a season whose sole bright spot wasJames Spaderdeclaring himself the “fucking Lizard King.” But like any 9-to-5 job that you come to begrudgingly love and that eventually changes your life for the better, you accept the lows because the highs are worth it. At its best—and there really wasso muchmore good than bad—The Officestrode the line better than anything else on TV between earnestly heartfelt and painfully uncomfortable. It was able to take the dull greys of a conference room and the sounds of clock too-slowly ticking to 5 and turn them into a home. “There’s a lot of beauty in ordinary things,” Pam says in the series’ final line. “Isn’t that the point?
So, naturally, narrowing this show’s entire run down to 50 episodes was a process as hard as it was long. There were times when I almost pulled out. Honestly, I didn’t think I could fit everything in to such a small space. Eventually, though, aftera lotof effort, I was finally satisfied.*
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50) Season 7, Episode 23: The Inner Circle
“Okay, a little about me. I respond to strong leadership.”
Was the sight of Will Ferrell juggling invisible balls to Evanescence’s “Bring Me To Life” enough to soothe the pain of Michael Scott’s departure? Not quite, but itdefinitelyhelped.The Officenever quite figured out what to do with Ferrell’s Deangelo Vickers, but this episode—which ends, amazingly, with Vickers being crushed by a basketball hoop—is laugh-for-laugh the funniest post-Michael entry in the show’s entire back half.
49) Season 9, Episode 22-23: A.A.R.M.
“Not enough for me? You are everything.”
Andy’s singing competition subplot here is admittedly terrible, as 90% of latter day Andy Bernard is. But “A.A.R.M” (that’s “Assistant Assistant Regional Manager”) also happens to include the emotional culmination of the best-written will-they-won’t-they turned romance in TV history: Jim Halpert and Pam Beasley. Jim not only asks the documentary crew to cut together nine seasons-worth of half-glances and awkward hand touching, he also finally gives Pam the letter he wrote all the way back in Season 2’s “Christmas Party.” “A.A.R.M” is probably the most deliberately schmaltzy episode inThe Office’s history, but dammit, after eight years of making us root for these people, they earned it. Plus, Craig Robinson absolutely slays the episode-ending dance routine.
48) Season 5, Episode 27: Cafe Disco
“You all took a life here today. You did. The life of the party.”
Speaking of dancing! If I’m being honest, not much of consequences happens in “Cafe Disco.” The show was still taking a breather after the genuinely tense six-episode “Michael Scott’s Paper Company” arc. But what it lacks in substance it makes up for by just being a damn good time. Michael’s attempt to turn his old office into a cafe bar and disco club is mostly an excuse for the cast to have a dance party, and the audience is invited. We also get Dwight trying to fix Phyllis’ dance-strained back, a legitimately sweet subplot between two characters who don’t get many moments.
47) Season 5, Episode 26: Casual Friday
“The trick is to undercook the onions.”
Three words: Kevin’s Famous Chili. Again, if I’m being honest, “Casual Friday” would make this list if it ended after the sight of Kevin desperately trying to scoop spilled chili into a pot with a binder, my personal favorite cold open on a show filled with classics. (The rest of the episode, in which the topic of “casual Friday” nearly forces a mutiny in the office, isfantastic. But man, that cold open.)
46) Season 7, Episode 25-26: Search Committee
“Bread is the paper of the food industry. You write your sandwich on it.”
There’s no more stressful time in any office than the arrival of a new boss, a tension the series mined to haphazardly fun effect in this Season 7 finale. The parade of guest stars makes “Search Committee” memorable—Will Arnett’s top secret three-step plan being the best, Ricky Gervais as David Brent a treat, and James Spader’s Robert California so intense he was able to stick around for a whole extra season—but it’s Creed Bratton’s clearly insane managerial style that steals the show. Creed throwing his car keys to a nonexistent valet is, no joke, the character’s best moment.
45) Season 2, Episode 6: The Fight
“Would I rather be feared or loved? Easy. Both. I want people to be afraid of how much they love me.”
It’s funny how an episode that ends with Michael spitting in Dwight’s mouth inside a children’s martial arts dojo highlights just how goodThe Officewas at subtle moments, especially in its early days. Of course, the machismo contest and karate punches between Michael and Dwight are the centerpiece. But the most memorable moment is Jim drafting an apology e-mail to Pam because of a playful exchange turned awkward…and then opting not to send it, because thenthatis awkward. It’s the type of understated human interaction that’s at the heart of this show. Plus, also, Dwight karate punching Michael in the stomach is just really goddamn funny.
44) Season 7, Episode 19: Garage Sale
“Your wife becoming me will I.”
Michael Scott and Holly Flax were a match made in some awkward, endearingly unfunny heaven, so it makes sense their engagement starts with a loving tour of the conference room, a triggered sprinkler system, and a pair of Yoda impressions. Not a perfect proposal, no, but it beats lighting the parking lot on fire and/or throwing a corpse off the roof. Meanwhile, Jim convinces Dwight to buy “Professor Copperfield’s Miracle Legumes” in the office garage sale, an already amusing subplot made ten times funnier by how aggressively Rainn Wilson pronounces the word “legumes.”
43) Season 3, Episode 13: The Return
“I don’t understand how someone could have so little self-awareness.”
In which Michael Scott—terminally uncool boss and king of taking it too far—meets his match in Andy Bernard, Cornell alum and poster-child for being “that guy.” What’s interesting about “The Return” is that the characters and the audience realize almost side-by-side how much the dynamic of the show is thrown off with Andy in the assistant role and Dwight working a new job at Staples. Thankfully, the world is righted by episode’s end; Dwight returns to his old job (claiming Oscar’s “welcome back” party for his own) while Andy is shipped off to anger management training after Jim’s phone-in-the-ceiling prank sends him into an acapella-fueled wall-punching rage.
42) Season 5, Episode 1-2: Weight Loss
“What is wrong with these people? They have no willpower. I once went 28 years without having sex. And then again for seven years.”
Most remember Season 5’s two-part premiere for Jim’s rain-drenched gas-stop proposal, but the moment is actually a low-key and quick one, and rightfully so. Jim and Pam were always about the build-up, anyway. “Weight Loss” actually belongs to the show’s lesser-used ensemble, all trying to lose weight for a company-wide contest. Stanley does leg lifts. Kelly eats a tapeworm. Creed confirms that was not actually a tapeworm. Meanwhile, a briefly goateed Michael continues his awkward pursuit of Holly, romantically tearing her Counting Crows tickets in two.
41) Season 1, Episode 5: Basketball
“Please don’t throw garbage at me.”
This entry is kind of the proto-”Cafe Disco,” an early episode that doesn’t carry much dramatic weight but is still a whole hell of a lot of fun to hang out in. The bulk of “Basketball” is a pick-up game between the office’s dream team (including Stanley, “of course”) and the warehouse crew, losers work on Saturday. Come for Michael’s borderline offensive celebration dances but stay for the episode-ending shot of Kevin sinking four straight free throws without a camera cut, something that astounds me every time I see it.
